Insanity at its Best!

I've been away for a little bit. I've been engaged in the madness of National Novel Writing Month.  This is where crazy writers engage in a form of self-inflicted torment to produce 50,000 words in 30 days.  It roughly amounts to producing a first draft of a novel.  All the while going about your normal day to day activities.

Yes, this is insanity at its BEST!

I share this with you because, I've done this for the past seven years.  Five of which I've reach the goal.  Last year, I completed my first novel and am shopping around for an agent for publication.

Writing is a passion, a life affirming act in my life that makes any trial, tribulation, or task ultimately worthwhile.

Knowing that I have Lupus explains that days where I'm writing and I have what I used to call my 'brain farts'.  I would have the word on the tip of my brain. I could see it, taste it, feel it, but I couldn't for the life of me formulate the actual word to put it on the screen of my computer or on paper.

As a writer, can I tell you how frustrating it is to lose words?

Now I know it to be cognitive haze. A solution I found would be to bracket the section, describe the word, then keep on writing.  Often the word would pop into my mind around 2 a.m. (yeah!).

Rest is key to my writing.  I have to make sure that I get enough solid rest for my brain to give me its best.

Why am I telling you all this?  Because Lupus is simply inconvenient. It is something that I work through to get the rest of my life done. Do I ever get annoyed with it? Of course!  I don't want to be tired, brain dead or hurting. That being said, I will live my life with an eye to the future I want to have.

Moments of Celebration

Yesterday was National Pit Bull Awareness Day.  I celebrated by hanging out with an amazing group of Pit Bulls and their owners for most of the day.  Quizz, my amazing side-kick, participated in two classes then, by the trainer's recommendation, went for his AKC Canine Good Citizen Certification.  He passed with flying colors!  I'm such a proud mama!

That's right, I'm CGC Certified!  Woot!

It was a long, fabulous, busy day. How could I not love hanging out in a place with such amazing energy?

The problem is that I'm so paying for it.  I knew that I'd be paying for it when we finally got home.  I'd been on my feet for almost 8 hours straight, by the end of the day my joints were starting to get really sore.

This is the conundrum I'm finding with life with Lupus.  There are things that are important to me. Things help define who I am.  Too not do them, then what's the point. I'm not going to admit defeat.

I will have my moments of celebration.  My moments of achievement.  These are the things that define a life.