Telling people outside my family about my Lupus has been a lot easier than figuring out how to tell the siblings about it. I know that my friends will support me 100%. I can trust them to be their for me through thick and thin.
They've never looked at me and said, "I just don't understand why you don't take better care of yourself." Like Lupus gives you a choice. You can be doing everything right. Eating right, exercising, but this is a disease where the immune system futzes out and rebels. In the computer world, we'd say a gremlin was in the hardware.
I love my family. I've discussed this with my mother. She's processing this. My father passed away from an unrelated terminal illness. This is not something she wants to deal with. I can't blame her. But part of me does. She's my mother and I want her to listen. So, if she's not listening, I'm pretty sure that the sibs won't react well either.
I'll tell them eventually, but the approach will be tough. There is no easy way to do it. I'm laying to the ground work. Putting Lupus support information on the blogs I write that I know they read, on my Facebook page.
I know that in their own way they love me and don't want anything to be wrong with me. I've seen them drowning in the depths of their denial. Frankly, I'm not sure that I have the energy to deal with their fear.
Yes, I'm being passive aggressive about this. I haven't fully processed this myself.
I'm going to go back to being an ostrich.
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